Babies and Restaurants are the Chernobyl of Parenting
By Dave Barry ~ Posted Sun, Oct. 02, 2005 on The Miami Herald.com
If you're a new parent, there will come a time when either you or your spouse will say these words: ''Let's take the baby to a restaurant!'' Now, to a normal, sane person, this statement is absurd. It's like saying: ''Let's take a moose to the opera!'' Click here to read the entire column.
Hi-tech developers and marketers have an inherent distrust toward each other as marketing feels that developers are overpaid with huge egos and developers feel that marketing is just a waste of money.
My friend Kendall says there are 3 sides to every story: one side, the other, and the truth somewhere in the middle so I guess there’s something to be said for both sides but an interesting dynamic none the less that I observed while working at a Huge Software Company. I fortunately landed in a group that was comprised of half development, half marketing so I could watch this human Petri dish spawn before me.
Developers at software companies are treated like demi-gods. They are after all the “assets” of a hi-tech company. They received the highest salaries, most stock options and, most disconcerting, the best offices with views of the Bay or the hills while marketing was banished to the dark inner cubes with artificial light. You might think that a ray or two of sunshine would slip through their office windows but let me remind you that it was developers occupying the offices with windows.
So?, you ask? Well let’s just say that had I not noticed the corporate ID badge on a few of these developers at above mentioned software company, I would have called the police. More than a few looked like they’d lived on the streets for years while their personal net worth could actually relieve the combined national debt of most 3rd world countries. Caveat: Now no one in my group was and not all developers are like this, so I am stereotyping, spare me the nasty emails, but more than a handful would qualify under this description.....
They are part bat working from 3pm until 3am at the earliest, personal hygiene is optional, haircuts and shaving are non-existent as that would take unnecessary time away from coding or playing Death Star, and the blinds are shut tighter than a drum lest any Vitamin D whatsoever penetrate their Star Trek t-shirt to their blindingly white skin which made any blemish resemble Rudolph’s nose. So a cross between Bart Simpson and a vampire would be relatively accurate. Ironically, they spent most of Monday lunch recapping the previous evenings’ Simpson’s episode, quoting it verbatim followed by peals of laughter.
Now what does this have to do with the funniest human being on the planet? Oh yes, that. Sorry. A rather large portion of Dave Barry's fan base (or target audience in marketing speak) are hi-tech developers who can also quote his columns verbatim, hence my introduction to Dave Barry. Their disgust of me was palpable when I asked them “Who is Dave Barry?”
Only the funniest human being on the planet, that’s who! One of the developers, bedecked in a South Park t-shirt, handed me Dave’s most recent book at the time and only a few pages into it I wholeheartedly concurred. While savoring his columns I inevitably laugh out loud, more often than not with tears rolling down my face.
His depiction of Rollerblade Barbie still makes me cry—you might remember this when he demonstrated it on Late Night with David Letterman years ago and nearly set Dave’s desk ablaze. Unfortunately Dave, Barry not Letterman, is on hiatus but I receive a weekly email with a link to a previous column and some highlights from his blog. I hope you enjoy his writings (old or new) as much as I do!